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Retra wished that he would go away. His vehemence frightened her, and his careless talk. He didn’t seem scared of anyone and she thought him foolish to be that way. He was like Joel. So confident and sure of what he thought. Why can’t I be like that? Why must I over-think and be so careful?
And yet, she’d attacked Brand when her anger had taken over. Perhaps she was not so different to Joel? Perhaps she was changing? ‘I hit a Riper,’ she said to him. ‘She was touching a girl called Krista-belle and I … picked up a stool and …’
Rollo’s eyes widened. ‘You’re the one who smashed the Riper with a chair? Everyone’s talking about it, but I didn’t believe it. What happened?’
‘Lenoir came and stopped Brand before she could punish me. But I don’t think it’s over. Modai said I’d caused trouble among them.’
‘Why did you get involved? That’s not a Seal thing to do.’
‘I … what Brand was doing to Krista-belle … she was scared … like when the warden gave me the obedience strip.’
‘You had a pain strip? Fross! How did you leave the compound then?’
Retra gave him a small, anxious smile. ‘I practised. The pain.’
Rollo’s expression changed. His eyes widened in a kind of admiration and he enveloped her in a comforting hug.
But Retra didn’t want comfort right now. She wanted to leave.
As she tried to edge out his grip he held on. ‘There’s something I’m going to tell you. The real reason that I came here,’ he said.
‘What’s that?’
‘You can’t tell anyone this. Not yet. Not until I say. Promise.’
She nodded, hesitantly, not sure that she wanted to know Rollo’s secrets.
‘When I went to the Grave Council meetings I got to know things. I listened to how they talked. They made lots of loud, empty noise most of the time but when they wanted something, their voices changed. Each time they talked of Ixion – how depraved the place was and what they could do to stop us coming here – their voices were loud and empty. At first I didn’t think much about it. Then one night when Father and I were walking home with Councillor Jarvis and Councillor Mison, someone called to them from the shadows. My father hustled me away but I saw who it was.’
Retra waited.
Rollo’s stare grew intent, as though he was trying to force the memory to life before them. ‘It was a Riper. At least that’s what I thought he was. I had to come here to be sure.’
‘That can’t be.’
‘It is! I saw Modai there,’ he said hotly. ‘And now I know that the emptiness in the councillors’ voices was real. They pretend to be angry about Ixion – but they aren’t, not really. It’s a game.’
‘What do you mean – a game?’
‘I don’t know but I’ve come here to find out why the Ripers are visiting Grave. There’s some tie between the two places that nobody knows about. I plan to tell the Youth Circle about it.’
‘What can they do?’ Retra felt suddenly exhausted, as if the energy that she’d gained from petite nuit had burned through her already.
‘They’re the ones who represent us to the Guardians. They’re specially chosen, and they get extra privileges for it. Look, there’s one of them there.’
Retra followed the line of Rollo’s pointed finger to a guy sharing a single armchair seat with a girl. He looked much the same as anyone.
‘They have a circle tattoo on their temples.’
In the dim light it was hard to see, but Retra had noticed circles on others. ‘What sort of privileges do they get?’
Rollo shrugged. ‘Not sure exactly except that they get to go everywhere except the forbidden places, and they don’t need to rest as much as we do.’
‘Don’t they burn out quickly then?’
‘’parently not. Ripers tweak their adrenal glands to give ’em extra time with no deficit. But they have to pledge their service to Ixion.’
‘What does that mean?’
‘Being good citizens. Not like the gangers. Telling the Ripers if they see people breaking the rules.’
‘If they serve the Ripers then how will they help you?’
He shook his head glumly. ‘I don’t know. Who else is there to go to?’
Retra didn’t know what to say to him. ‘When will you tell them?’
‘Soon. I wanted to find my way around before I open my mouth.’ He grinned, cheering up. ‘I’m loud but I’m not stupid. Will you come with me to the Circle? You can tell them about how things are for you in Grave; how evil the Council are.’
‘Perhaps,’ said Retra. Kero and Krista-belle hadn’t sounded impressed by the Youth Circle. ‘But not now, I have somewhere else to go.’
‘Another club?’
‘No.’ Should she tell Rollo what she was doing? He’d seen something important in Grave. Maybe he should come with her; learn more about Ixion before he went to the Youth Council. ‘It’s a meeting. I’ve been invited to become a member of the White Wings.’
‘You! In a gang?’ Rollo made no effort to hide his astonishment and disbelief.
‘You’ve heard of them?’
‘I’ve been resting at Goa. Place stinks of mould, and there’re vines growing in through the cracks in the walls: giant roaches come in on them. Or so someone said. I couldn’t relax, waiting for one to land on my face. Anyway, that’s where the Wings mainly hang out. They’re way cool. Especially Kero. Word is he can take anyone in a fight except for Dark Eve from the Cursed League.’
‘I wouldn’t know about –’
‘Take me to the meeting!’
Retra felt uncomfortable. ‘I’m not sure –’
‘Why not?’ Rollo gave her a wounded look. ‘I told you about the Council and the Ripers.’
‘It’s just that …’ She started to defend herself but trailed off when she saw his gaze drift across her shoulder and his eyes grow wider.
‘Look at those hot pants,’ Rollo gasped.
Suki was standing behind Retra, alone, pretending not to see them.
‘That’s Suki.’
‘You know her?’
Retra nodded.
‘Well, for Grave’s sake, Retra, introduce me!’
Retra got up and went over to Suki with Rollo at her heels. Suki tried to turn away but Retra stepped around in front of her. ‘It can’t be long until Early-Eve. We should go to the meeting now.’
‘Oh-you-still-want-me-to-come-do-you?’
‘Yes, I do,’ said Retra. ‘But the bead you took is making you agitated.’
A relieved smile spread across Suki’s face. She scratched her skin. ‘Dunno what that means but it’s making me itchy.’
‘What colour bead did you have?’ piped in Rollo.
‘The-red-one-who-are-you?’
‘I’m Rollo. Retra and I go way back.’
‘We do no–’
But Rollo cut across her. ‘The red ones are usually okay, but some people react more to them. It’s the black ones that are really strong. You don’t want to take them. Phew!’ He tapped his head. ‘Like a bomb’s gone off in your scone. Now, where’s this meeting?’
Suki gave her fiercest stare, which came off a little weird as she hopped from one foot to the other and scratched her arms. ‘What’s-it-to-you?’
‘Like I said, Retra and I are buddies, and I’m thinking of joining the Wings as well.’
Retra was dumbfounded by Rollo’s easy twist of the truth.
‘So you know where the Grotto is then?’ said Suki before Retra could stop her.
Rollo gave Retra a victory smile. ‘Sure. Down the mountain from Illi. You have to go back to Vank station and switch kars. I can show you.’
Retra glanced around, carefully. Modai had moved a little closer to them. Perhaps it was better have Rollo with them. He seemed to have an instinct for handling situations. ‘Modai is still watching us. Suki and I’ll go first. You should wait a few moments. Look bored, and then leave. We’ll wait for you on the Vank platform.’
Rollo nodded in approval. ‘Sounds like a plan. Make sure you wait. You won’t find the Grotto without me.’
‘What’s-going-on?’ asked Suki. ‘Why is Modai watching?’
‘He’s been watching Retra since we came through the Register together,’ Rollo said. ‘He hassled her just a little while ago. I saw it and distracted them. He says she’s caused trouble among the Guardians.’
Retra winced at the totally unguarded way Rollo spoke. As if the three of them were confidantes when they’d only just met.
‘What?’ he said, sensing her reaction. ‘That’s the truth, isn’t it?’
‘It’s-okay-she’s-not-used-to-talking-to-people-It’s-the-Seal-thing.’ Suki linked arms with Retra. ‘Come-on-silent-Seal. Let’s-go.’
Surprisingly, Suki’s teasing didn’t offend her and she was smiling when they ran into Markes and Cal in the foyer. They were with a boy who had circles tattooed on his temples.
‘Retra?’ Markes looked her up and down. ‘You look different.’
Retra thought he did too, but didn’t say so. He wore fitted black pants and a thin white T-shirt that showed off his broad chest and strong arms. His guitar was slung over his shoulder. At least he wasn’t speaking quickly like Suki.
‘Hello, Markes.’
‘You’re not leaving yet, are you? I’ll be playing soon. Ruin has come to listen. You should stay.’
The boy with the circle tattoos put out his hand. Something about his milky-blue eyes made Retra uncomfortable. ‘Hello, Retra, and …’
‘Suki,’ said Suki. ‘We-can’t-stay-we’ve-got-something-important-to-go-to.’
Retra squeezed Suki’s wrist in warning, but it was too late. Ruin’s attention was caught. So was Cal’s. She flicked her straight white hair back from her face and stared hard at Retra.
‘Hey, Seal, I heard you upset the Ripers already. Good effort.’
‘She-was-protecting-one-of-us,’ said Suki.
‘Whatever. What’s so important that you’d miss Markes play? More trouble?’ asked Cal, provocatively.
‘Mind-your-business.’ Suki scowled at Cal. Her almond eyes narrowed to angry slits.
Retra tried to think of something to allay Ruin’s curious look. ‘We’re meeting some boys at another club. That’s all,’ she said.
‘Okay. See you later then.’ Markes seemed disappointed.
‘Yes,’ said Retra. She wanted to take him aside and explain but it was too risky. He might tell Cal. Or worse, Ruin. From what Rollo had said, the Youth Circle didn’t approve of the gangs at all. She took Suki’s arm and drew her on.
‘What is her problem?’ snarled Suki.
‘Her name is Cal,’ said Retra. ‘Don’t look back.’
They hurried back along the path to the station. This time nothing spoke to Retra from the dark. Still, she was shivering despite the sticky warmth when they boarded the kar.
‘What’s wrong?’ asked Suki, as they took one of the back seats.
Retra didn’t answer her even though Suki’s voice sounded more normal and she’d stopped scratching.
‘Look,’ Suki said, after a while. ‘Friends talk to each other. That’s what they do. Tell each other things.’
Retra licked her lips and forced herself to speak. ‘Do they?’
‘Haven’t you ever had a friend?’
Retra stared out the window. Joel was her friend. Did that count? And Toola had been for short while, though Retra knew her real interest had been in Joel.
But Suki wouldn’t let it go. ‘You’ve never had a friend? That’s impossible.’
‘There was a girl called Toola, but after my brother left and the warden came to live with us she stopped …’
‘What? Being your friend?’ Suki frowned. ‘I don’t really understand your world but not everyone from Grave is as private as you. Look at Rollo. He’s not like that. What’s it like there?’
Retra leaned back on the seat. She’d only ever thought about her world, never spoken of it to another person. Perhaps she could tell Suki. The Council can’t hear me now, she reminded herself. The warden can’t touch me.
‘Seal South is stricter than the rest of Grave. We aren’t allowed to speak to others at will. Only at certain times.’
‘That’s just plain loco,’ said Suki.
‘We’re taught that our Elders left the Old World to found a better place with stronger morals. The Old World had become depraved and without rules. The young were vicious and selfish and self-destructive. The Elders called their behaviour a sickness.’ As she spoke, the memory of her history lessons flooded back. ‘They sailed among the stars looking for the perfect place to start again but their travelling ship malfunctioned and they were forced to make their home on this world. They built Grave, and sealed it off from the native barbarians who shared the land with them. Growing walls kept the barbarians out, and over time they gave up trying to fight us and left us alone.’ Retra stopped, eyes widening. ‘I always thought that part was just a story. But now I see that there are other cultures on Grave. Maybe your people are the barbarians?’
Suki crossed her arms. ‘Well, for a start, this world is not called Grave. It’s called Stra’ha’ine. And your people sound like barbarians, not mine.’
‘I suppose so,’ allowed Retra, not wanting to upset the girl.
‘You mean, “I guess so”?’
They both smiled and the awkward moment passed.
Retra continued with her story. ‘Some of the Elders believed in firmer rules than the others. They moved to the south of the city and put up their own walls. They called them the Sealed South Walls. That’s where I’m from. That’s how we got the name.’
‘So what’s it like in Seal South?’
‘Cold,’ she said. In so many ways.
‘What about your parents?’
‘They believe in the rules. Especially my father. Mother does as he tells her. She used to read to me but he told her to stop. She used to brush my hair out at night but he said it encouraged unclean thoughts.’
‘Unclean thoughts.’ Suki smirked. ‘Why wouldn’t you want them, anyway?’
But Retra was too caught in her memories to react to Suki’s teasing. ‘After my brother left, Mother didn’t speak much. It was as if all the life went out of her.’
Suki screwed up her nose. ‘Your home sucks. Mine was just boring. Hunt, kill, skin, salt, cook, eat, clean and bury. Then start all over again. But we laugh a lot.’
‘What about Liam?’
‘Won’t be the end of the world if he doesn’t come here. I mean, that Rollo’s kind of cute.’
Retra didn’t know what to say to that, so she didn’t say anything.
When Rollo arrived at Vank the three caught the next kar on the Illi line. He sat in front of them and hung over the seat the way Krista-belle had done before, chattering to Suki about Goa and the White Wings, while the kar creaked along its cables like a tired beast.
Retra stared out, noticing how Ixion’s lights seemed a little dimmer and the dark seemed lighter. This must be what Kero meant by Early-Eve.
‘What causes the ever-night?’ she asked, interrupting them.
Rollo stopped short and stared at her. ‘The anomaly, of course.’
‘What in Stra’ is an anomaly? asked Suki.
‘The Golden Spiral. When we crossed into it on the barge, the dark came. It’s some kind of disturbance in the normal way of things. The Grave Council have been studying it for years without an answer, so they call it an anomaly. It’s just another name for something abnormal.’
‘In Stra’ha we call it the Blur. Have you ever had spots floating across your eyes when you stared at the sky?’
Rollo nodded.
‘It’s like one of those. A dark spot in front of what you see,’ she said.
‘Does that mean it’s everlasting?’ Retra wanted to know.
‘Who cares?’ said Suki. ‘It’s not like we’ll be here forever. One day we’ll be withdrawn to another place.
’
Retra hunched her shoulders at that and stared back out the window. She would be gone before then.
The Illi platform was wider than Vank and lit by ornate iron and glass lamps. A cobbled path branched out from the wooden platform along the mountainside.
Rollo led the way, walking backwards along the cobblestones so that he could talk. Retra stayed close to Suki, wary of what lingered beyond the path. She could smell the electricity of the dark, feel its charged fingers reaching for her.
‘We’re here,’ said Rollo.
Retra lifted her gaze. Uphill from the steps stood the vast stone edifice of Illi church. Where Vank was spire-angular and ornamented inside and out with hardened wood, Illi was built on rounded lines and decorated by bevelled mantles and pillars. Fire torches lit the outside and, as the warm breeze played with their light, they splashed grotesque shadows across the face of the church.
Rollo pointed downwards. ‘The Grotto is at the bottom of these steps. It’s part of the old Illi gardens and was an outside place to worship. I haven’t been down there yet. At Goa, they told me that the Grotto isn’t safe. People go missing from the steps all the time.’
‘I can’t see any lights,’ said Suki. She was alive with curiosity. ‘Do you think anyone is down there?’
‘There’s a rock wall at the bottom of the steps. It curves like a half-moon. The Grotto is on the other side of it. The wall will most likely shield any lights. I guess that’s why people go there. It’s private.’
Retra stared at the steps disappearing down into the night. ‘It’s getting darker again.’ Even as they stood there, the lights of Illi grew brighter, signalling the passing of Early-Eve. ‘We should hurry.’
‘Me first!’ said Suki, as she went to plunge down the steps.
Retra caught her arm. ‘Wait, there’s a password to get in.’
‘What is it?’ asked Rollo.
‘The age of rage,’ Retra whispered to them.
Suki pulled away and kept moving. ‘Still gonna be first!’
‘Hey, wait!’ Rollo catapulted after her.
Retra followed them more slowly, heart in mouth. A dull glow lit the rough steps as if somehow it produced its own energy. Even so, shadows seemed closer than they should be. Was this really the right place? Did Rollo know or was he making it up? She found it hard to trust someone she hardly knew. And yet he’d trusted her.